Disturbingly Hairless.

Details are sketchy at the moment, but word on the streets is that Stretch Armstrong will be played by Taylor Lautner from New Moon. Way to peremptorily destroy your budding acting career dude. As if looking like a little bitch wwasn’t bad enough, now you’ve got to run around in a speedo for 90 minutes stretching your body parts in kids’ faces. You know… that’s a crime in some places.

Vocab’s Take: Yet another sign of the apocalypse… a third Hasbro toy being made into a movie. I can’t stress how big of a terrile flop this is going to be. Hopefully, someone will take some scissors and cut open the movie Stretch Armstrong to see what’s inside.

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